Balance

Last night, while talking with Ann and Sandy, I suggested the following: “The consensus is that I talk too much and she doesn’t talk enough.” This was met with the inevitable response: “Maybe you could help each other find a balance.” My reaction: “Screw that! I like being extreme. We don’t want balance.” And with that, I punched Aristotle right in the face.

Granted; balance is not as overrated as peace. It has its place; in a cocktail, for example. I suppose you could say I enjoy balance in moderation. But consider how boring “balance” generally is. Symmetry, average, repetition. It’s immediately obvious that most people desire and even depend on these things. Comfort is another similarly categorized idea that others venerate. Contrarily, my passion is serendipitously finding something I love and then exploring it by obsessing over all the unfamiliar it contains. I tend to love that which is anomalous, inexplicable or even shocking. I don’t rest on laurels or seek comfort. I’m far too impatient and curious to ever be idle.

Others like to preach about bad balancing good or whatnot. I don’t even believe in unequivocal goodness or badness, let alone that they could somehow neutralize each other. I appreciate the difficult times because they give me the most to learn from; not because they somehow balance out the most enjoyable times. That argument is absurd enough that I’ll plan on devoting another blog post to it soon.

Compromise has its place, but I don’t think it should be demanded or expected. It would be a tragedy for anyone to get their way all of the time and miss out on all the unknown and unexpected life has to offer. I enjoy surprising myself by participating in adventures that I wouldn’t have chosen to do if it were only up to me. But I’m not going to continue to do things I don’t enjoy or disregard my own opinion. I’m not going to water myself down in an attempt to become more palatable to others. I refuse to go out of my way to convince anyone to like me. I don’t want others to dislike me, either. I’m just not going to pretend to agree or passively participate in anything. I won’t rely on someone else to form my opinions. I’ve observed that most tip-toe through life too afraid to even try to form their own opinions.

Most seem to either want to change you or want you to change them. I’m not like most. I much prefer being whoever and whatever I feel like being and letting others do the same. I expect little other than honesty. My love is unconditional, and has no balance whatsoever. Love might be the willingness to do anything for another and, in return, expecting only to be allowed to express that love. Extreme.