“Why would you put that shit on the internet for the whole world to see? If you want to write shit like that, why don’t you get a journal and write in that and then hide it away like I do? You better take that blog down. You better take that blog down now!”
It’s not a bad question, even though it wasn’t really a question. I had never written anything about her at all, but if I had I would have erased it at her request. I know I’m referencing her now, but I’m going to refrain from discussing her or my thoughts on her further.
I write this shit to try to connect; same reason why I drummed. I keep hoping I’ll find somebody who knows what the hell I’m talking about. So far no luck, but I’ll keep you posted. In trying to connect, I write for an unknown audience imagined as liking what I like. (For example, I really like decapitated Precious Moments figurines.) This is vastly different than writing in a journal, where you literally write only for your own future self. I actually did write in journals relatively prolifically during college, but it was all so predictably naïve I burned it soon after graduating.
I’m interested in writing in the moment; for the moment. Who cares how it turns out tomorrow? I experience my existence one second at a time so that’s how I express it. I try not to over-think life; I’m more interested in living it, even if that means causing some waves that capsize a boat or two. If you can't deal with me, get out of the water or get a bigger boat.
One reason for this blog was to write odes to my friends, and strangely enough most the friends who I’ve written about and gotten feedback from have in fact been to some extend offended or at least confused by what I wrote. What the fuck; I love you, get it? I write about those I think about and miss; I don't dwell on my enemies (One of them tried to bait me here early on but gave up when ignored). As a drummer, I always appreciated getting honest feedback from various perspectives about what I was doing (aka what they were hearing). Frankly, my friends should know me better than to think I’m gonna pump sunshine up their ass, and that’s the projected audience I’m writing for.
The criticism I get about my blog, besides that it’s uninteresting, is that it’s all true but they don’t want to hear it. This is a MAJOR gripe I have with most humans, and exactly why complete and utter deceit like religion, Disney and Oprah Winfrey are so popular. “Tell us lies that we want to hear. YAY!” Also, I agree with the Bukowski sentiment that if you're writing anything your parents will like then it's bullshit.
I’m also writing this blog to learn how to write. I try out different styles, voices and such. If I knew how to write I wouldn’t be working on a blog; I’d be working on getting a publisher. This happens to be the 100th blog that I’ve posted, and I do think my writing has improved.
5 comments:
It is too late, this blog has been recorded for future time. Your writing doesn't land on blind eyes. The blind do see. I appreciate your blog as it informs our conversations and allows me to consider which matters to elicit your opinion. Thank you.
I am, for now, the great wise and foolish Anonymous.
I see your point re: this blog is preserved for future times, but I'm writing with a present audience and not a future one in mind. This blog's future relevence can then be discussed and remain present via the comments section.
in a hurry or i'd think of something clever re: eliciting my opinion.
Ah, I intended the comment about 'recorded for future time,' as a response to the quote about taking it down. Unless the entire construct of the internet goes down, it is recorded by google among others. For example, you can see a cached page here:
Google Bourbon search.
Yours,
Anonymous
okay wow; i didn't know about all that!
A voice from the future! I'm reading this blog 8 days later! It's soooooooooo outdated.
Post a Comment