Delusion

I know enough about drumming that I can highlight the flaws of every drummer (Buddy Rich lacked subtlety; Max Roach lacked chops…). Furthermore, since I no longer play drums, I can declare once and for all that I am the greatest drummer of all time. It’s too bad that my best performances weren’t recorded so that one day, more discriminating and advanced cultures can discover my under-appreciated and under-recognized genius. I can only reminisce at my former greatness and cringe at the pathetic excuses for drummers I hear today. I tried to teach, but frankly it was beneath me. Like any good teacher, I sought to motivate my students with the fear that they really weren’t worth my time, which was true. It’s a shame, really, that I will never be able to appreciate music with drumming again, as I am constantly distracted by the burden of having the ability to do a better job than whomever the drummer is. But alas, since I see no point in actually picking up my drumsticks ever again, I guess I will just have to grudgingly settle for the plebiance of everybody else.